sin

sad to be me
sad to feel like this for myself
sad really for something i've done
also i embarrassed to GOD..
i did sumthing bad en i hurt HIM for many times
i'm sorry GOD !
especially today,,
i really can't understand what happens with me
i was trying to control my emotion but i can't

first,,
my sate today talks about de initiative to forgive
GOD teaches en reminds me to forgive everyone for many kind of probs (small or big probs)
but after like an hour, i lost a temper
which just happened cos of a simple thing
~ cm gra2 ga jd pegi jln2 cos si cc mo jln2 jg ma tmn2nya. ngmg nya si cc ga enak en sewot gt as usual en gw kesel krn ga jd pegi dmn gw dah niat bwad pegi. ~
i lost a temper again with ngebanting pintu kamar nyok
fyi. i've never been like that again since long time ago hmpf

second,,
many times i almost said bad words when i got stress or angry especially at school
i've never realize if i'm gonna think bout that words again
it's like weird if all that words are out from my mouth
but i always almost said it huxx
i also always try to keep that words, so then i don't say it
i also still trying to not think about that bad words when i got stress or angry

i can't understand why must this happen to me again
don't have any idea why i did all of it
a simple word i always say to HIM:
sorry GOD ~
i know it's easy to say sorry,
but i really wanna try to control myself not to think en do the same mistakes like i've done before
thanks GOD for reminds me in everybadthings i've just did
pray for myself to get back to YOUR way..
i feel if i'm lost for now,,
don't feel YOUR attendence in my deepest heart :'(
find me out en bring me back to YOUR side, please !
* MAAV *