taq tawu ahh jdulna apahh.

hr mgg melelahkan skaligus menyenangkan
dtamba hr snen sengsara namun jg menyenangkan
hahahaha.

hari minggu,,
hari perjuangan berada di greja dr jem stenga 7 pagi sampe stenga 4 sore
cape? pasti iya donk.
tp gw sangat menikmatinya bs playanan spanjang d greja itu
kbaktian pertama untuk VG bersama teman
lalu kbaktian remaja untuk jd liturgos dan VG lagii
snenk banged banged rsana bs beri berkat mlalui pujian2 kami
dan sangad bersyukur krn Tuhan udah kasi VG yang luar biasa bwad qta
talenta yg luar biasa shg mbuat VG ini jadi berkat bagi smwa
1 point yg bqin gw amad senank abis kbaktian rmaja
slaen kotbah Pdt. Agus yg bwad gw sgt luar biasa maknanya,,
wktu ngenalin Pdt. Agustinus Kermite a.k.a pdt baru qta,
he said a simple thing which made me feel soo happy..
he said: 'ini anak saya hahaha'
dy ngmg itu di dpn smwa jemaat gw smbil ngrangkul gw
feel WOW en seneeennnkkk bangedd !!! *lebai sehh hehe*
trus rapat perpus bntar smbil bcandaan so pasti
lalu trakhir adlh latian Kantata utk Paskah bareng om2 dan tnte2 hihi
seru sehh,, ada lagu susah dan ada lagu gmpank
gw blajar bersama mreka dlm baca not dan byk hal lagi yg gw plajarin
knal tnte2 dan om2 serta kk2 skool mgg yg geblek2 jga haha
abis kelar, qta pulang dehh :)
sampe d hums, ol en nonton tipi bntar ajahh
trus mandi en siap2 smwa anak2 pd dtg bwad lat agm
wpun tlat stenga jem, akhirnya qta kelar jg en cabootss
cabuts ke WGP bwad mkn malem en ktawa ktiwi
sampe 1 ropit ngeliatin qta smwa krn ktawa ngakak gtaw diri haha
maap tnte di blakang voni yg sampe gebrak meja pake gelas huahahhaa
ga lagi deh ke ropit, malu bangedd !! lols
berakhirlah smwa stelah qta plg ke hums hihi

hari senen,,
hari yg diawali dgn ujian praktek skool
cape banget krn hr mgg dah forsis badan kerja nonstop huahaha
ujian inggris.. sdiqit gagal yg impromptu..
ga ngerti deh gmn hasilnya,, pasrahh gw ga bisaa !!
klo agama.. terbilang sukses wpun td ngmg agak tersendat krn gugup hihi
kelar agama,, qta bersorak gembiraaaaa UP tggal vollii haha
foto2 bntar en mkn warsun dehh..
mkn bubur telor plus kangkung di warsun haha
gilaa mkn bubur seharian ><
ga pake lama, qta pun plg en gw molor lamaaa hahaha 3 jem kali,, lupa xP
abis itu ol bentar en lets goo to de rs
gilak rs aja ruamee tenan,, ngantri 1jem akhirnya masuk
trus ronsen en hasil akhir bhwa gigi bungsu gw mau tumbu 4-4na
hebad yaa barengan smwa.......
tpi gigi kanan atas udah mau tumbu dluan, mkana gusi dah bgkak
dan ini yg bqin sakit slama 2 hr ini tyt
yahh ap bole buat akhirna cm dikasi obad anti bgkak
trus bwad cabut calon gigi bungsu yg bawah itu nunggu sakid lagi aja baru k dokter lagi
geblek deh nie gigi haha ga beress xP

that's all about my 2 days journeys :)

ada apa c dgn hr ini ?

hari ini bs gw blg sangat menyenangkan,,
ktawa ktiwi sama tmn, berjuank up jg, en jln2 k mol bsama
tpi ada bbrp hal ganjal di lingkungan rmh gw
bnr2 ga ngerti apa yg sala sama diri gw ndiri hr ini
dari pagi, tmn2 gw dah dtg k hums bwad blajar
dan respon mba gw udah ga enak bwad gw minta tolong
dtambah lagi gw dgr kabar buruk yg mengecewakan gw d grj
trus nyok jg ga beda sama mba gw,, sama aja anehnya
udah gitu gw jg cape en butuh diam d rumah
tiba2 terlontar kalimat maksiat yg gw anggap krg sopan
dari mulut nyokap gw ndiri hmpf
apalagi yg krg ??
bingung sbenernya ada apa sihh hari iniii ?!?!
gw mrasa ada yg aneh dgn mrk di skliling gw..

sorry GOD i can't feel perfectly Your existence here..
i know i have a big probs with Our relationship en it's bcos of me..
give me strength, God ~

wats goin on my life

there r some things i wanna share bout 2day en some days in de past
first of all,, today i got a damnie tiring day
i slept late last night en i have to woke up early this morning
cause some of them wanted to study at my house,,
then went to school to do our best in our practical test
and finally we went to de mall to watch de cinema
after it was done,, i decided to come back home
took a bath en went to de church again yippiie..
wohoo mantabb deh hari ini, ga brasa ada ujian praktek wekeke

but there's sumthing which hurted my deepest heart
i do dissapointed with all she has done to us
i do very sad to see u change again for these weekends
she's totally change and i don't what has happened or wat's goin on her
i can't say anything to talk bout it,,
but 1 thing i believe if i will always pray everything de best for her
i hope it will be happen en u'll have ur own commitment
so then i don't need to have private msg to u in sms
God will happen,, i do believe it :)
help me, GOD !!

What about today ?!

Wake Up Call woke me in the morning at 09.00
* gaya lagu Maroon 5 hahaha *
lalu online en download bbrp lagu baru plus ntn tipi hihi
then get ready to Cilandak with mes parents
ceped2 ngibrit mandi en caboets scepet2nya haha

a long wat to go avec mes parents to Cilandak
or just say near my future University
( bodoh bgt dehh,, gw mjauh dr SGU tp sptina akan kmbali ke
gedunk itu krn PrasMul yg akan nempatin gedunk SGU smentara
dan SGU pinda k gedunk baru. Cape2 gw ga k BSD,,
ttp aja akan ke BSD hahaha gelooo )
Oh well back to de topic,,
after muter2 around there, we just srek with 1 new minimalis house.
dunno why, from de 1st time i saw it, i love it already hehe
ya bgitu lah,, akhirna gw dapet tmpat kos masa dpn gw
stelah diukur2 how far is my kos en de univ ya akhirnya agree lah hoo
umm brp lama ya kira2 ??
15 menit lah jalan kaki,, mayan juga boo..
tp tenank,, banyak tukang ojek di dpn komplex hahaha
mantabb dehh td nyari kos2annya hueheu

tidak lama stelah itu langsung aja ke Sencit berhub perud dah triak minta mkn
akhirnya mkn wendy's jg wpun jau2 k sencit wekeke
pdhl tadinya mau makan di Urban,, tp puenuhh gilaaa
jadi ya cukup di fudcort dehh mayan wpun sumpek banget krn rame xP
then we bought SOUR SALLY,, yippiie !!
* maav Beqh,, bgitu masuk sithu gw lgsg liat tmpt duduk qta dlu
dan teringat masa2 bodoh yg menyeramkan itu hahaha *
makan yoghurt uenaakkk !!
habis itu langsung deh ngibrit k cmpaka mas bntr lalu Gold's Gym
ganti baju. sms2 bntr. trus langsung pake PT, si ci Ellen :)
cuapee dasyatt gilaaa.. rsana tulang mo rontokk OMG !
tp gpp deh,, perjuangan gw akan berbuah baikk nanti hihi
stelah bercape2 ria en bersih2 dgn mandi,,
saia pun lgsg balik k rmh dgn cepad krn dah dtunggu Dian huee

yeyy akhirnya sampe di hums juga hihi
mnunggu sampe yg laen dtg dan langsung bergegas blajar kompie
bcanda2 blajar dan kelarrr,, lalu ke ropit bareng haha
kocaklicious ~ hari tnpa beban ad ujian praktek besokk hahah
dan mlm ini brakhir di ropit huee seruuu
pulang pegi naek motorr bareng DN gilaa
seru lahh hr ini yippiiiee...

National Leader's Training

hari Sabtu dan Minggu yang lalu, tepatnya tgl 21-22 Maret 2009
gw ada acara CISV yg sbenernya ga gw inginkan untuk ikud
acaranya itu adlh National Leader's Training..
gw brangkat sabtu pagi dgn bdn cuape beradd
dsana gw ktemu tmn2 leaders yang baru dari Chapter Cendrawasih
or even Chapter Krakatau..
They are soo fun en crazy haha wpun qta banyak sminar bwad persiapan,,
tp teteup aja ada bcandaan dsana sini karna mreka asik2 smwa
wpun baru kenal, tpi kita bs langsung haha hihi githu sama mreka
oh ya,, gw jg ktemu sama my ex-staff in Summer Camp Indonesia :)
nice to meet you again kak !! miss u a lot !!
snank banget deh bs ktemu lagi stelah 3 taon ga ktemuan hehe

well.. i've learnt many things when i was in the camp..
qta banyak sharing dan pengalaman how to be a good leader
banyak masalah2 yang taq terduga bisa terjadi dan how to solve it
trus forms bwad pegi ke International Program this summer juga
then also how to make some games, simulation games, and discussion
which it should be based on the CISV Education Circle..
tman2 yang menyenangkan en bisa diajak kerja sama
bisa diajak bcanda juga,, sharing many things about the programs
the most important part for me was the sharing time with Tante Mira
we talked about what do we need to do, to bring, and to prepare for our camp
thanks to all the staffs and trainers :)

i love that simple and busy camp cause they speak more english than indonesian
so then i could feel comfy again with english and enjoy to talk in english
hmpf tiring day made me couldn't go to the church :(
get ready for everything !!
smangadhh !!!

dimana mereka ?

pergumulan gw yg brikutnya,, rsanya pergumulan hidup thu ga ad abisnya..
gw bingung. gw sedih. gw kecewa. gw gtaw musti ngmg apa. gw gtaw musti gmn.
itu yg lagi gw alamin skarang ini..
mreka yg dl bersama dgn gw dlm suatu pelayanan,,
skarang gw mrasa ada yg hilang, yaitu mreka..
hilang tnpa gw tau penyebab sesungguhnya
gw mrasa smwa dah brubah dan gw ga lagi bsama mreka di greja
dl gw rajin playanan bareng mreka dan slalu bersama,,
tp dmn mreka skarang ??
gw ga nemuin jejak mreka dlm masa pelayanan kali ini
ga lagi gw bs melihat kbahagiaan mreka dlm playanan
en ga bs lagi gw liat muka smangadh mreka utk playanan
dgn mudah dan perlahan, mreka undur bgithu saja
ini cukup membuat gw sedih dan kcewa..
tpi inilah kenyataan,, so gw harus brusaha balikin mreka jln bsama lagi
jalan untuk playanan yg mnurud gw itu mulai berkurang

struggle ~

POKE SUSHIIII

~ de crue of tentwuu ~

mini reunion

wahh i'm SHOCK !!
speechless en soo damn happy ..
i really don't understand how cool are they hahaha
i really can't believe they will do it just for me
they are awesome ~

this summer i'll have my seminar camp in Sweden
en i'll stay in Norway for like 5 nyts in Tonis' house
for this kinda situation, i do really excited en happy already
then i told my other friend from Germany and my other Norwegian friend
about my summer plan,, then guess wat they said ?!
they really want to meet me, wherever en whenever it's possible ..
i do really really speechless when she said my Germany's friend is searching for the flight
flight for her to go to Norway just for our mini reunion
OH MY GODD !!
and my other Norwegian friend wants to meet me also in Norway,, WOW !!
i really can't believe if it's gonna be happen to me

i met Tonis in Oslo, Norway around 4 years ago
she looks so different with the last time i met her
ofcourse chaaa,, come on.. it was 2002 hahaha .
when our first meeting at the hotel's lobby, she looked really tall
but me ?? not at all hahaha poor me ~
and how about this 1 ?!
Eike who's from Germany tries to meet me this summer
she's thinking to meet me in Norway when i'm there
i don't know exactly what my expression will be when i meet her again
my last time i met her was 2002,, err 7 years agoo..
just the same like Hanne who's also from Norway
and 7 years ago was my last time to meet her..
see how fast the time flies away hahaha .

well i'm freaking EXCITED to meet them again as a mini reunion !!!
i'll be there as soon as possible gurls ~
~ HOW LUCKY I AM !! ~

Beautiful Savior

when i hear "Jesus" in my heart, don't know why i really feel comfortable
and all my burdens like already gone away..

hari ini bner2 melelahkan,,
dari kegiatan gw en otak gw yg lagi byk pikiran hmpf
entah krn cape ato apa ga bisa, gw ga ngerti..
VG gw hr ini kacau,, ga konsen en emank cape
tp di luar itu,,
gw bnr2 dpt bantuan en dpt support gra2 pkataan singkat org grj gw
'hidup itu pilihan en ga semwa yg kita mau bs kita lakuin'
that's wat he said to me ~
bantuan jg ada bwad gw dr berbagai pihak dlm bqin liturgi
senenk banget akhirnya bs kelar en tggal di masukin aja k kompie

hri ini udah cukup mrasa cape dgn penuhnya otak gw
gtaw apa penyebabnya,, gw mrasa kecewa dgn diri gw
urusan greja smwa kteter en serba mdadak huxx
ditambah lagi mgg dpn jg ga bisa k remaja lagi
sudahlah,, hidup ini emank pilihan dan gw harus pilih yg terbaik
maav banget temen2..
kangen sibuk di greja en bs konsen disitu,,
stidaknya more than 50% gw bs konsen ngurus greja itu

untuk skrg ini, gw lagi byk yg perlu dikerjain
dr sibuknya skola persiapan untuk ujian2 semwa,,
trus ada cisv yg harus gw ikutin acara2nya,,
en ditambah greja yg gw mulai aktif di kbaktian umum
gw bukan mengeluh dgn semwa kerjaan yg udah jd pilihan gw
tp dsini gw lebih mrasa kteteran dgn smua itu..
gw pengen smwanya bs gw atur dgn max jd bs dilakuin smwa
tnpa gw harus pusink krn itu kteteran :(

sorry for all my frens, especially frens in korem yg gw tinggalin trus
gw tau peran gw besar dsana, tp sikon bnr2 bqin gw ga bs kya dl
gw pun jg sedi krn skrg terlihat cuek dgn remaja huff
help me GOD ~

in my prayer, icha bnr2 senenk krn bs mrasakan Tuhan
icha jg ditamba smangad wkt majelis pbina ngmg kata2 di atas
trus mlm ini icha mrasa tenaankk banget saat doa en dgr nama Yesus di hati
rasanya smwa beban itu bisa diatasi dgn bersandar sama DIA
i just wanna say,,
Jesus is really a Beautiful SAVIOUR !!!
thanks LORD for Ur strength..

last week

post ini hanya ingin mencritakan hari2 kmaren yg dah laluu
mgg lalu sehh bnr2 perjuangan keras ga klr rumah
klr rumah cm bwad ke skolah doank huee
perjuangan keras blajar mati2an buat TO
dan hasilnya cukup mgembirakan wpun masi ada bbrp yg ngaco
bbrp ul yg masi ga tuntas en sdiqit mengecewakan

de special day for me was on fri till sun :)
seruuu skalee 3 hr ituhh !!!
hari jumat adlh hr trakhir TO di mgg itu,,
trus plg skola beres2 barang en packing
lalu tacuuu ke JHCC bareng tmn2 nci gw yg amad gilaa
bcanda taq taw diri di dlm boil hahahhaa kocak
ngaps tuh k JHCC ??
so pasti qta nonton JASON MRAZ in Java Jazz Festival 2009
mantab boooo !!!!!!!!!!
rame hebad yoo en serunya minta ampunn wekeke
lari2an en pgank2an serta demped2an hihi
plg dgn teler en puyenk,, so i fell a sleep in the car
langsung tidur sampe rmh en ...

dtglah hr sabtu di pagi hari pk 05.00
harus mesti kudu jln pk 06.00 ke Puncak bwad PC 1
wah wah perjalanan panjang yg ga ngantuk sblomnya
tpiii qta teler bgitu nyampe sana hihi
kenalan dgn org2 baru (leaders) yg seru en menyenangkan
banyak blajar dr mereka
dan punya ksempatan utk ldr's training bareng pagi itu
finally de camp was start ...
wohoo !! pengalaman ptama gw bwad bs maen bareng anak2 kecil lagi
dlu gw sbagai anak2 kecil itu yg ikut acara,,
tp skarang gw diharuskan ikut evaluasi en breafing acara
yg artinya gw dah dibentuk dan dipersiapkan utk bs jd leader
leader yg btugas menjaga anak2 itu ..
asekk sehh pengalaman pertama,,
jd bs kenal mreka2 yg masi kecil dgn kepribadian yg beda
en aplg di cisv,, mreka jg punya latar blakang yg beda pula
asekk lah pokoknya !!

i'll be back on 21st-22nd of March for these Int. Ldr's Training :)

PreCamp 1

date is 7th-8th of March 2009
place is in Wisma Anugrah
participants are delegations, ex-delegations, en many more

start from Jason Mraz concert on 6th of March in Java Jazz Festival 2009
it was soooo COOLL !! hahaha
never thought it's gonna be very FUN en very WOW !!
back home was like 23.35 WIB,,
i was too tired so i decided to go to sleep ASAP when i'm home

the next morning, i need to wake up early
cause i'll go for this PreCamp at 6am WIB
long journey to go made us to be there at the place
there was just Bu Jo who have been there b4 us
then after all the new leaders came over to the camp,,
we started our Leaders' Training with Bu Yaya
although i'm not allowed to be a leader yet, but i learnt many things from it
and i meet new friends between the leaders there hehe
but the thing is i need to have more energy as the seminar participant
cause they just served me as a leader to help all the staffs
the camp was start en we joined with them to play
so wat did i do in that camp?
first day, we tried to control the kids in the games
we tried to have fun with them
we tried to know them and make them comfortable to be at the camp
and the special jobs for all the leaders and seminar participants,,
we had an evaluation at NIGHT and breafing for the next day

this the 2nd day which also mean as the last day
sad to hear about it,, but happy also to hear about it
cause i can do my own 'hibernation' hahahahaha lol
back to the topic ~
2nd day started with breakfast, games, packing, games, evaluation, en done !
okeii let me tell you wat i've done there
cause of i'm old enough between the participants,,
they chose me to be a leader of the team
umm i have a mini group consist of 8 people (include me)
we need to do the games, found the clue and the answers
for myself,, this is my 1st time to lead a mini group in cisv
wat shud i do are :
1. i need to make them comfortable with this new group
2. i need to lead them as a group
3. i need to communicate with them
for no.3, i do need bravery to speak out first with them
like 'perkenalan' en questions or many other things..
how was my group,, first of all we didn't know each other yet
then i tried to know each other by saying their own name
and the game was finally start !!

in indonesian dehh..
ptama2 seh ya gitulah masih pd males2an, aplg blom kenal
tp stelah bbrp pos qta lewatin dan gw usahain bwat mrk nyatu
akhirnya berhasil dan mrk malah saling bantu en lari2 donk
otomatis gw harus kasi smangad dgn ikut lari2 hihihi
yaa ada bbrp yg ga mau ikut lari2 ptama2nya
just like they didn't enjoy the game..
it was fun en i wass soooo happy cause at the end,
mreka respect sama gw en jadi mudah bwad duduk per klompok
mreka juga jadi nyariin gw stelah games slese..
first experiences with many happy things i've got with them ~
qta 1 klompok bs dqet kya gitu cm hanya dlm waktu 3-4 jam..
hebadnya CISV !! Proud to be 1 of de CISVers..

well guys,,
there were just a short sharing from me bout my happiness
my happiness to be a new 'leader' in a small group :)
thanks guys !!

buat gw, CISV adlh tmpat gw blajar byk hal en bs ngembangin otak gw hihi ~
oh aniwai, i had a freakin weird en bad dreams on sat nites :(

oh well..

wat can i start in this post ?
for sure,,
i do really happy to have this BEAUTIFUL weekend
after de whole tests week with stressfulness..
but beside that,,
i have probs with my score aniway :(

i know i got worse than the 1st smester
many of my tests were failed
not just the normal test, but also the tryout
that's the point !
i got many bad scores in my tryout for now
and for geo,, i don't know wat to say
en i just can say i was too stupid to get score..
but for english,, hmpf ~
really sad to myself & feel like i'm so stupid
*back to indo*
mxdna itu dmn gw skarang terlalu malas untuk blajar
juga terlalu cuek banget sama nilai
alhasil,, i just got a good score between all of the bad scores in 2nd smester
oke then,, that's all was my fault ~

damn so sad to hear bout that..
i wanna say sorry to GOD,,
to myself,, to myFRIEND,, and my family..
bad scores for this 2nd smester :(

bad score

hari ini bs di bilang hari baik gw tp skaligus hr buruk gw
hr ini tryout byasa2 aja dgn soal ekop yg susahh
akun seh gampank deh ga terlalu susah

oh well..
ist dimulai en lgsg ke kantin bwad blajar agama
di situ gw ktemu beqh yg lagi blajar ma yg lain jg
tiba2 gw mdgr kabar buruk dr rbeq
kalo nilai geo gw kembali merah dgn nilai hancur (45)
sjujurnya gw bgng harus kya gmn lagi,,
gw cukup pusink utk blajar geo
gw blajar semampu gw dan hasilnya hanya bkisar 45-50
itu blajar ga blajar lohh !!
gw taw gw terlalu sombonk en byk ngmg
dan gw ga pernah buktiin dgn nilai gw
gw terlalu bodoh dan egois shg gw jg ga bs atur diri gw ndiri
gw tenank2 en hepi2 blajar agm sampe akhirnya kelar jg
kelar agm langsung ngobrol2 d bawah
en tiba2 lagi saia di toel Pa Yo dgn kabar buruk utk k2x nya..
saia ditegur krn nilai ing gw yg byk merah
yahh udah gw sebut semua di atas en mbuat gw makin drop

stelah diinget2,, ul gw smester 2 ampir semwa TURUN
entah musti sediihh.. kesell.. marahh.. ato gmn lagi gw bgng
emank gw jg jauhh jadi malas di smest 2 ini
mgkin gw akan kena omel di pembagian rapot mid smester 2 nanti
sulid banget untuk bs terus rajin en niat blajar
gw lebih terganggu utk bersenank2 drpd blajar
dan hasilnya bgini,, ulangan2 gw kembali merah
ga mau lah balik jadi gw yg kya kls 10
pusink bgng sedi superstress... !!!!!!!!!!!!

KN banyak banget bahannya !!!!!!
GEO gilaaaaaaa !!!!!!
INGGRIS jugaaaaaa !!!!!

wat can i say besides dat wordss.. ?!

huaaa edan eui hari ini..
TO hr ptama kelarr dgn tenang2,,
wpun amad cape ye mata baca ul BI huahaha ~
lalu pulang langsung dilanjutkan dgn belajar mat bersama
awalnya hanya bertiga dgn penuh kepusingan dan kelelahan
plus kedinginan pula juga wekeke
namun tiba2,, dtglah mreka2 para lelaki mau blajar bareng
yahh apa daya,, kami langsung aja pinda tmpat ke bawah
en blajar bareng ngajarin para lelaki itu
dgn tnpa disengaja gw jadi blajar dgn sriuss

utk gw pribadi, tyt lebih enak ngajarin org drpd hrus blajar ndiri
jujur aja,, ngajarin org itu lebih byk ilmu yg gw dapet
contohnya aja tadii..
awal2 bertiga cm ngerjain soal sediqit krna dilanda malas
tp waktu para lelaki dtg en wajib ngajarin mreka
di situ gw juga sambil blajarr waktu ngajarin mrekaa
tnpa disadari ya emank bgitulahh ~
serunya blajar bareng,, tp ga rame2 amad en ga lama2 amadd

sekian kegiatan gw hari ini yg ckup memusingkan en melelahkan
dari melelahkan otak sampe melelahkan fisikk huahahaha .
mari berjuank kawan !!!
give all our best for this tryout,, ora et labora ~


private msg from my heart..
sorry if i say u've changed a lot since de last time we had fun together,,
en i feel so hesitate between 'iRi' or 'cEmbuRu'..
sad to have this feeling hmpf
can we back to the beautiful time in the past ??